“People are so easily offended these days. You can’t say ANYTHING anymore!” Such is the attitude that seems to have taken hold in certain corners of the popular modern imagination. We’re living in the era of “cancel culture,” and to hear some people tell it, it’s the worst thing that could possibly happen to society. If only people would just stop being so sensitive, we’d be able to focus on things that really matter, instead of spending all our time tiptoeing around the “snowflakes.”
A person who’s considered to be easily offended is called a “snowflake” because they “melt down” when someone challenges their belief that they’re special. But this is a rather simplistic view. Yes, there can be a personal aspect to taking offense, but it’s about more than just wanting to feel unique, and it’s usually tied up in the larger social systems that we inhabit. Psychologically and even philosophically speaking, offense happens when someone says something that runs counter to deeply entrenched beliefs: about ourselves,[1] the societal structures we depend on,[2] and how the two relate to each other. It’s more than annoyance or disagreement; offense is the result of an external attack on the internal framework of our lives. So, for example, a statement that women shouldn’t be pastors would assault both my identity as someone called to ministry AND my perception that this calling is accepted and validated by my community. I would become offended in defense of these presumptions that define how and where I fit into society.
To be perfectly clear, the act of taking offense isn’t good or bad in and of itself. Its moral value depends entirely on what ideas it seeks to protect. When we become offended, we’re making a bold statement about what we value, both personally and communally. When used for the right reasons, the act of taking offense can actually be an important tool for claiming social power for the benefit of society as a whole. This thing that we’ve collectively decided is an indicator of personal weakness or sensitivity is, in fact, less about “melting down” and more about holding a line. It turns out that, when someone takes offense, they’re being less of a snowflake and more of an icicle: hard, sharp, and unyielding.
This is evident in today’s Scripture reading. There’s nothing “snowflakey” about the crowd in Nazareth. Throughout the entire passage, they’re holding a personal and societal line. At first, the line is easy to hold: they have no objections to Jesus’ words because, from their perspective, THEY’RE meant to be the recipients of the Good News he’s preaching. They don’t see him as challenging their identity or position in society; they think he’s reinforcing it. His words match their understanding of what they deserve, both as individuals and as part of Jesus’ own “clan.”
But when Jesus tells them that their assumptions are mistaken, they become offended, and they suddenly have to hold the line AGAINST Nazareth’s favorite son. Jesus preaches that he has no intention of “playing favorites” in his hometown, which contradicts the crowd’s understanding of the status that’s granted to them by their identity. Their offense quickly takes a violent turn – less like despairing snowflakes melting on the ground and more like icicles with a grudge plunging downward – because his words threatened what little social power they felt they had.
Now, should Jesus’ sermon have caused such deep offense? THEY’D certainly say so. After all, they’re part of an historically oppressed people – first the Egyptians, then the Philistines, then the Canaanites, then the Assyrians, then the Babylonians, and now the Romans had all tried to rob them of their autonomy and identity at different points in time. It’s reasonable for the crowd to believe that, as God’s chosen people, they’d be first in line for good news and liberation. It’s understandable that they’d want to push back against anyone who contradicts this deeply held belief. From their perspective, they not only DESERVED help from God; they NEEDED it more than others. So we can understand their offense – but we still probably wouldn’t agree with their methods of expressing it.
Yet if Jesus were to come back today and tell us something similar in our own context, what would we do? Would we be offended? Would we react the same way the crowd in Nazareth did? Before answering, think about what form a similar message might take today:
“I know you think you have the moral high ground as Christians, but I’m going to help the non-Christians first.”
“I know you think you’re the most blessed because you’re USAmericans, but I’m going to help the Palestinians and Ukrainians first.”
“I know you’re suffering from inflation, but I’m going to help those on welfare and food stamps first.”
“I know you think your needs should take priority because you fall into society’s prescribed categories, but I’m going to help the trans community first.”
Each of these statements is a modern equivalent to what Jesus told the crowd in Nazareth. They represent a similar assault on our own sense of identity and social status. Would you not find even one of these proclamations offensive? Would you not be tempted to push back? Before you answer, keep in mind that we take PLENTY of offense when others say this sort of thing – we bristle and shoot back, “It’s all well and good to help others, but we need to look out for ourselves first!” So why would our feelings about these statements change just because JESUS is the one to say them?
These ideas offend us because they upset pre-existing expectations about our own importance in the social order – they run counter to “the way things are supposed to work.” And as natural and understandable as our taking offense might be in psychological terms, it doesn’t justify how similar our collective response is to that of the crowd in Scripture: rejection, vitriol, threats, and even violence against anyone who might dare speak such “heretical” thoughts aloud.
Now, don’t think you’re absolved just because you, personally, might not engage in any of these things. Through our silence and inaction, we are all just as culpable as those who choose to respond with aggression. In fact, if anyone is a snowflake when it comes to taking offense, it’s us: while the icicles take decisive action to pierce through the ideas threatening their worldview, the rest of us cowardly melt away without any evidence that we were ever there.
There had to have been at least a handful of people like that in the crowd at Nazareth, a few snowflakes unwilling to stand up to the savage impulses of the icicles. Imagine if even a few of them had had the courage to stand up to the crowd, encouraging them to sit with their offense for a moment instead of flying off the handle. It could have made a difference: “Now, wait a minute, fellas; I’m upset about this, too, but he’s not wrong. That IS what happened in Scripture, remember? Maybe he’s got a point. I mean, do we trust God to do what’s right and good, or don’t we?”
It’s natural for human beings to get offended, to become rigid icicles every once in a while. Social norms exist for a reason, and of course we want to protect our own self-interest. But as people of faith, we have a responsibility to determine whether we need to hold the line or give God the chance to melt our resistance. There’ll be times that we become offended by someone challenging social norms that are closely aligned with God’s will – norms like justice, mercy, and integrity – and in those cases, we NEED to stand firm. But there’ll be other times when we take offense at the very things that God stands for; indeed, has ALWAYS stood for: community care for the poor, radical welcome, loving our enemies. In those times, we need to stand down. Even though it will feel unnatural; even though it will feel uncomfortable; even though it will feel wrong. We should trust the priorities and plans of God more than we trust our own, because of the two of us, only one is perfect (I’ll give you two guesses who it is, and the first one doesn’t count).
Offense can be an important tool in a society, but it’s not the whole toolbox. It’s more of an early warning system of when something could be off, but once it’s triggered [4], we have to use the other tools at our disposal to determine whether the offense is warranted. For Christians, those tools are things like Scripture, prayer, and community discernment. They are NOT things like personal preference, knee-jerk reactions, and “the way it’s always been done.” If we’re leaning heavily on the latter, then maybe we need to consider a shift. Holding the line is important in some cases, but it’s from the puddles of melted icicles that the kindom of heaven will ultimately spring forth. May God grant us the wisdom to know when to let go of our offense. Because, to paraphrase Olaf in the movie “Frozen,” “Some [things] are worth melting for.” Amen.
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[1] https://www.nelson.edu/thoughthub/counseling/the-psychology-of-offense/
[2] https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2024/09/why-are-you-so-offended/
[3] Matthew 20:16, NRSVUE.
[4] Pun 100% intended.
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